Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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What do you call a black guy with a gun? A soldier.

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What did one retarded person say to another? asiuasdhfiusanklasndfkjlnknankjas

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What did dean carmon say to his brother? - I don't know I'm not his brother

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Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

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Yes.

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I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

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An Englishman, Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub where they are presented with a situation, the Englishman and Scotsman react appropriately but the Irishman does something foolish.

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

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Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

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What did the FBI agent say to the CIA agent. We're both agents

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Libraries.

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What's black and blue and red all over? Due to the infinite nature of the universe many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner.

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What is the difference between a jew and a tree a tree is awesome and a jew is a jew

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

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How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops