So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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A man walks into a crowded bar and orders a beer. The bartender doesn't hear him due to the background noise of everyone talking and the man has to repeat his order.

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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No

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whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retaarded guy? A. Your retarded

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I only like NY as a friend.

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2 boys are going to get candy from the store. What happened? A robbery and they were killed

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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Whats worse than finding a real joke on anti-jokes? -Nothing

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How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

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What did the apple say to the pear? Fred, you are going insane and i'm getting a divorce.

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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ring ring young man: dad? mom's dead? woman: i think you dialed the wrong number young man: .......oh im sorry, you're absolutely right, silly me! woman: don't worry about it. young man: (chuckles) click

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What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like pie. I know you do too.

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

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When did the ball-room finally close? Closing time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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