If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

You know whats worse than getting punched in the face? Getting kicked in the balls.

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuase 7 watched his friend die. He slowly went into a depression so deep he went on a murderous rampage.

Yes, I'll have the cordon bleu, see voo play.

Wanna hear a joke? 9-11

i'm funny

What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refridgerator

What did the giraffe say to the other? nothing giraffes cant talk

Hey could I ask you a question? Yes Thanks

What is three times more dangerous than war? Three wars.

why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

Why was little Sammy crying? because she had a frog stapled to her forehead

This sentence is not humorous in any fashion whatsoever.

whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

What is the difference between a dog and God? A dog is physical living creature while God is a supernatural being.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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