pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

thumb_up thumb_down -12

My neighour knocked on my door at 2.30am last night, can u believe it? 2.30am? How rude I thought. Luckily I was still up, playing drums.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot. Duh.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I WILL DESTROY ISIS

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

thumb_up thumb_down +1

So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

what did the pregnant black woman say to the white man I'm pregnant

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's red and hurts your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why do skinny women eat their food fresh cooked? So that they don't contract food-borne diseases and risk dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Penis-Pump

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's black, white and red all over? A dead panda

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful busness man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops