How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

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Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

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What did Jesus say when he made the first black person? What another perfect creation to this world!

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Dude 1: Hey, ya see these coins here? Dude 2: ya, what about em'? Dude 1: would you say you see these pretty often? Dude 2: yup... :/ Dude 1: so would you call them COMMON CENTS!?!?!?!?!

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Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

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Justin Bieber

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Q:What do African American men call the Internet? A:The Internet

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If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, its probably a turtle.

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

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A squirrel runs into a bar and out-runs the bartender to get some assorted nuts on the table then runs out of the bar

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

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A young boy asks his father if there will be cake at the party. The father tells him there won't be and tells him to f*ck off.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

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Why didn't the puppy play with his toys? They were poisonous.

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*Pretend your an orphan] Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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Golgo12 here, I can see how some people consider you insane Nero, glad to know point zero is the starting ground of your elysum, that should show them how a modern society should be like. You got six years left to live? That sucks man sorry to hear that. Ur real name is Nero? Axel Knight sounds so much more... You.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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