Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

What does a Dominican and a Russian have in common... they are both thinking of a funny anti-joke to post on this site...

knock knock who's ther? chris chris who? JUST OPEN THE F***ING DOOR AND CHECK IT OUT

Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

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Ron Paul for President!

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

Yes!

A marine biologist is captured by a group of violent pirates. After hours of being tortured, the pirates make him walk the plank. As he is pushed on to the plank, they ask him for his one last request. He responds "Kill yourselves." The pirates proceed to stab themselves until they bleed out and the marine biologist is the last man on the boat.

Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

Hi my name is Bob

knock knock whos there? yo mama yo mama who? yo mamas mama!!

I drive a 'rarri

What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

Why is Eeyore in Winnie the Pooh always sad? Cause he has a nail in his anus

Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

lol

Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

How do you make Mandy Ann shut up? Clown Car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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