3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

if you can raed tihs steence it menas you are ceelvr eugnoh to uendnrstad tihs: no sex cusaes dgdoy eeys

Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

What is similar between a penguin and a newspaper? If you kill a penguin, then grind it up into a fine powder, then the penguin becomes a newspaper.

Did you hear the one about the black guy that went to college? Me niether

What can eat, sleep, and reproduce? Not a rock, that's for sure.

What do you get when you combine High Fructose corn syrup. sunflower oil, carbohydrates, and water. How the heck should I know!

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

The President, a terrorist, a student, and a genius were on a crashing plane. They all died.

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can not talk, therefore we can never find out from the chicken, who is the only thing that knows why it crossed the road. Scientists have study chickens and say that it most likely saw something edible, like a bug or some grain and walked over to eat it.

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

A Christian, a Jew and a Muslim fly in an airplane. They all reach safely to their destination and have a lovely vacation.

TJE ELIAS, LÄGET?

Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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