what has four legs but cant walk? a dog after anal

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

thumb_up thumb_down +2

guy 1: hey, i got a new dog. isn't he cute? guy 2: i just lit him on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An american, a brit and a mexican are on a plane. The brit throws out a bag of tea, explaining to the confused others: "We have so much tea in England we can just throw it out!". The mexican proceeds by throwing a bag of peppers out, explaining "We have so much peppers in Mexico, we can just throw it out!". The american proceeds to throw the mexican out of the plane. "Why did you do that?!" exclaimed the brit. The american turned around. "He killed my wife."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

thumb_up thumb_down

a man walks into a bar after a long day at work, and asks for a drink. he finishes, pays the bill and leaves a handsome tip for the bartender and heads home.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

An Irish priest molested many children. He's still free today

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What happens when you read every anti-joke on anti-joke? You spend a lot of time in front of a screen. This means you should have a 10-15 minute break, so that your sinuses can rest and you don't develop a headache.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Last christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you're body rejected the transplant and you died.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats red and hard to eat a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

thumb_up thumb_down -10

three people come to a serial killers house. one was annoying one was immature and one was stupid he would put them all in the same boat. then he towed it into shark infested waters, sunk it and watched them speak their mind. the annoying one said "nah nah nuh boo boo you cant eat me!" the immature one said "im gonna ride one!" and the stupid one said "could you please tell your sharks to stop eating my leg? i need it to swim away from these sharks that are eating my leg." moral of the story: dont go to serial killers homes. they will most likely kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is a dog's favorite color? None,dogs have colorblindness.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If you give a homeless man a fish he eats for the night, if you teach him to fish then he probably won't be able to feed himself anyway, he is too poor to afford a pole.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo' momma is so fat, that- Wait. Sorry. Too far?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops