A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -286

Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

i think quinn is gay? you probably don't know him but when i walked him on him shoveling a ken doll is his butt

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

thumb_up thumb_down -29

i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

thumb_up thumb_down -2

There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops