What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

here is Stevie Wonder's poem: sjkgfhdujduehfheuefeufhhf uefuefg eufbejfbefehfehutuge' wiohl;wreohqweiothurelwueths sjtghekltrhlsdifhlziurhlsiurhtwoli

Three jews walked into a bar I lied, it was a gas chamber

Doctor! I have no problems at all! So, uh why are you here? Isnt that freaking weird? Wow, that might be a problem! Puh! I have a problem then. Yeah, goodbye!

HALF LIFE 4 COMING OUT SOON!

Help I'm being raped!

What's the best way to look 10 pounds thinner? Lose 10 pounds

What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

Knock knock Who's there? Honey, just let me in. This bloody game can't go on for an hour. I'm cold out here.

Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

Obama getting elected in 2012.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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