What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

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A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

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A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

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What's the difference between a Justin Beiber concert and a hedgehog? With a hedgehog, the pricks are on the outside, but in a Justin Beiber concert, the pricks are on the inside.

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Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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What do you call a hickey on your shoulder? Bad aim -Cooper Simpson

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Justin Bieber walked into a gay-bar, The whole world applauded.

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Why was Timmy dirty? Because he was buried

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What's the difference between Vagisil and Black People? They are disgusting!

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I used to be a Businessman like you, then I took a plane to the North Tower.

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Whats the difference between a black bird and a white bird? Their colour

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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If you see a pink banana, you are color blind.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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What did Little Timmy say when his house fell down? I'm not sure but that sounds like a very sad seen that I hope to never encounter in my personal experiences.

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Roses are red Violets are baskets This joke makes no sence... ... boobs

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Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

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Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

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What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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