What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

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How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

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Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

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What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

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Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

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My girlfriend says i cant finish a sentence properly dripping horse cum fetus rape.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Where is my tractor?

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Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for Christmas? The sweet, merciful release of death at the hands of his father, who had been struggling with the emotional and financial drain of raising a severely disabled child for many years. It was only a matter of time before the man snapped, as he was a single parent working twenty hour days, seven days a week, to just barely cover all the medical bills that the specialists and therapy incurred.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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Why didn't the giraffe go to the zoo party? He didn't receive an invitation.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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i think quinn is gay? you probably don't know him but when i walked him on him shoveling a ken doll is his butt

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Once upon a time there were seven dwarfs. They were named Steven, Jason, John, Peter and Alfred.

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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i would like to know if the rumors about the moon being made out of chees is true because nobody told me it was CC

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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