what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

A Mexican man, an American man, and an Italian man go to a bridge. The mexican said "we have too much of this in our country!" and throws pasta into the water. The Mexican man says "we have to much of this in out country!" and throws a taco into the water. The American throws in the Mexican man and says "we have to much of these in our country!"

Ey hornboy give es a SCAB

A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

What is more addictive than World Of Warcraft? Heroin

How do you feed 1000 people? Cook 1000 meals .

Q. When you drink two 5 hour energies, do you get 10 hours of energy or double the energy for 5 hours? A. You die

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her...

Knock knock. Who’s there? Your son. Your son who? DAD WHY CAN’T YOU ACCEPT THE FACT THAT I AM GAY!

Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? A:Pull the pin and throw it back

Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

What did the farmer say when he didn't like his tractor? Man, i don't like this tractor

Why did the black men chase the chicken ? Because it wondered out of a barn.

a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

whats the differnce between a cadilack and a pile of dead babies? theres no cadilack in the back of my car1 >.>

What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

What happened to the short kid on april 30th: His girlfriend broke up with him

Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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