Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I thought I was ugly But then I met you

What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

Knock knock, Who's there? Pizza hut delivery service, here's your pizza, Thanks.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

a horse nibbled a baby

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

A blind guy and a priest walk into a bar

What did Santa do on Christmas? NOTHING HES NOT REAL!

A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

A rabbi walks into a bar mitzvah

What's the difference between a Justin Beiber concert and a hedgehog? With a hedgehog, the pricks are on the outside, but in a Justin Beiber concert, the pricks are on the inside.

Why'd the man go to jail? Because he had a piece of cheese.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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