whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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Roses are red violets are blue I would test our new water bed so be carefull with your helled shoe!

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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there was a little girl walking through a park. then she was kidnapped and most likely raped and sold to a foreign country.

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What do you call a three-legged cheetah? Crippled.

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sorry, that was a really bad joke, joking just joking, of course we can chat later, you got something in particular to do?

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Why was the black family eating KFC? Because KFC tastes very nice and there was a discount on the family bucket.

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What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

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Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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How do you make a plumber sad? Steal his plums.

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What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

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Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

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So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

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OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

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knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

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knock,knock who's there? the postman didn't answer as he is deaf

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Q: Why did the young boy run away from girls and screamed that they had cooties? A: That's what little boys do. He also has an abusive home life

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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