What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

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Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

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So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

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OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

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knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

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knock,knock who's there? the postman didn't answer as he is deaf

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Q: Why did the young boy run away from girls and screamed that they had cooties? A: That's what little boys do. He also has an abusive home life

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

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Whats brown and sticky? Anal sex

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

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why do birds fly away when you go near them? incase your black

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A baby right after I kill it

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why did the baby fall out of the tree? the monkey dropped it. why did the monkey drop the baby? it was dead.

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Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

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Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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