Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

Tall asians

Q. What does FIAT stand for? A. Frenzied Italian At Traffic-lights.

Q: Why Marc can't run? A: Marc is a leaf.

Two men walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O!" The second man says "I'll have some H2O too!" Both men get water, because the bartender knows better than to give someone dihydrogen dioxide.

A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

I'd like to make a withdraw

A horse walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything or say anything because it is a horse. It proceeds to walk around and knock over a few tables before finding the door.

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

a guy on the street throws a boy between 2 priests

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car. A. Get in the car.

Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

What's white and looks like paper? Paper

Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

Amanda Knox walks home free.

What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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