what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

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And now a word from our sponsors

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

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John, Where are you John: Here! Where's here? John: nevermind

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Why wasn't the child swimming? It drowned

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test

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Your mom is so stupid, that she took an IQ test and was proven mentally retarded. Her family is devastated.

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

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Why is meth so addicting? Why? Hang on, i gotta go do some meth

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h

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Trashcan!

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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What's green and says I'm a frog? A talking frog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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