Your mom is so ugly that she decided to work as a prostitute and she died a virgin.

One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, Dick in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

There was a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were all of equal intelligence.

Roses are red Cranberries are tart It sure stinks when you fart

I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

What do you get when you cross a horse and a donkey? a mule

Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

Why do seagulls fly over seas? Because if they flew over bays they'd be called bagels.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

How do you tell if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Check for footprints in the butter.

knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

There is a Mexican and a Black guy in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican, you racist bastard.

A man goes to a doctor to check about an itch on his testicles. Turns out it was just a rash and is promptly prescribed medication and it clears up in a week.

Your mama's so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

can't wait until the baby boomers die

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

An Asian walks out of the library.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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