What's the difference between a black guy and a picnic table? Many things, really. Beginning with simple structural features such as the number of legs, of which there happen to be four on a generic picnic table, and two on a human being. One might observe that a typical african american male is between 5'8" and 6'2" in total length, whereas a picnic table, being made to support 6-8 people will generally be slightly longer. A black guy will generally be pictured standing upright. A picnic table is usually horizontally laid out upon a flat surface. The former is living or dead, the latter is usually nonliving, processed wood or metal. The former may move about from day to day of its own accord, the latter is completely stationary, and indeed very difficult to relocate, etc.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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Q: who's Snow White's brother A: egg white Get the yolk!

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Your momma is so old, she has lived a wonderful, long life and witness a lot of human achievement.

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How do you wake up your friend in a reasonable manor? you beat the shit out of him

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What do you call a seven foot Egyptian named Randy who trains leopards to uproot floral cactuses? Randy.

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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What is black and white and red all over? a nun that got raped.

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Your mother is so old that she is dead.

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why did Max cry??? chicken

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Why did I get raped

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What did the kid say when you gave him a cookie? Thank you.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

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What do you call a group of jews hiding in an attic? Well, this sounds very similar to the events during World War II in which Anne Frank and various jewish refugees hid from the Nazis.

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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How do you make time fly? Well! You cannot really make time fly. Imean, yeah, iguess it feels like time flies when your having fun, but it moves just as fast as always!

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how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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How do you confuse a person from France? By screaming in english at the sky while pionting at him.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops