say this really fast D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, D I C K, C H I C K, C H I CK, D I C K IF YOU CANT LIKE IT

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Buy one packet of condoms for the price of two packets of condoms, and you will be given a second packet of condoms ABSOLUTLEY FREE!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between Hitler and shit? Shit has a shower in the morning.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

thumb_up thumb_down +10

womens rights to vote

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Your mama so stupid. She tried to climb over a glass wall to see the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Why did Lil wayne decide to be a rapper? Because he would earn a very large amount of money and fame.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

horrible joke I I I I I I I VVV

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, who shat in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Larry stopped by today to drop of a package. The package was a bomb. So I gave the "gift" to my neighbor for her birthday. My Mom is my neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What abou three times

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +38

I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops