A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ouch."

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Last night I had the strangest dream. I was eating a big marshmallow and when I woke up this morning I had appendicitus

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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How do you wake up your friend in a reasonable manor? you beat the shit out of him

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What's brown and sticky? Human Feces

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Where did Sally go in the bombing? Everywhere

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Im sorry Dylan Hodge Jamie Stegman

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Jingle bells, batman smells, robin laid an egg.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They are captured by a tribe of cannibal natives. The natives say " find 10 fruits of the same kind and bring them back" The first guy comes back with apples The natives say " shove them up your buttox without showing any sign of emotion" The firs guy gets to the second apple and then woos in pain the natives kill him The second guy comes back with blue berries he gets to the ninth berry and laughs. The natives kill him. The two guys are in heaven. The fist guy says " you could've survived why did you laugh?" the second guy replies," I saw the third guy coming back with pineapples"

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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What is the answer to the question of Life, the Universe and Everything? That doesn't make any sense.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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this sentence will end in the way you expected.

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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billy has 100 candy bars he eats 78 of them what does he have now diabetes

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What do you get when you cross a cantaloupe and a dog? "Melon-choly"

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Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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