What did the creepy old man do to the child? Took him to baseball practice

why did the chicken cross the road ask jake darby

Why was the protester tied to a tree? They were tired of him protesting.

What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

The hooker walks into a bar wearing a vest and tight denim shorts. A drunken man proceeds in trying to have his way with her. He is thrown out for sexual mis-conduct and is currently waiting for his court date.

A Jewish man overhears another man making a joke about the Holocaust. The Jew says, "Hey! You! My father died in the Holocaust!" The other man says, "Oh, I'm sorry. What camp was he in?" The Jew says, "Camp? No, my father had a heart attack."

Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

A cruise ship took sail. It was about a mile out into the water already. The blonde had missed the ship when it set sail. She was only capable of swimming a mile. She swam a half a mile out after the ship, and then turned around. She then later died due to a severe case of hypothermia due to the temperatures of the water for long periods of time.

What's the similarity between a plum and an elephant? Both are purple, except for the elephant.

"Hey have you seen Stevie wonders car. Neither has he.

Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

Roses are red, Violets are Violets. Screw this poem. Potato.

Fill in the blank: Hello my name is ___, and today I would like to ask you why you put your real name in the blank? Posted by: BerserkSpoon

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

roses are red violets are blue everyone is stupid how about you? -I'm not Im black

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw them

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

What smells like death and makes kids cry? Dead animal

There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

A muslim walks through a medal detector before the entrance of the airport terminal. The alarm goes off and he is arrested by TSA officials, they open his jacket and find 30lbs of high explosives.

What did the zombie eat for breakfast? You. You fell a-sleep

Q: Why did the crazy man stare at the orange juice container? A: Because it started talking.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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