Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

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I like it in the butt. - Tyler James Nehring. Call me if you want to give me the d. 863-670-1547

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Why does batman wear a mask? Because if he didn't every enemy would know who he was, go to his house a brutally murder him.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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How many baby's does it take to paint a wall Depends on how hard you throw them

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Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

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What would Helen Keller say to Obama? Wow Im really impressed that you are our nation's first black president. You're doing a great job. Except it would come out like DUUUUURNNNNNAFMKAAAALLLL

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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A fish swims into a wall. It does not say anything, seeing as fish do not possess vocal chords and therefore are incapable of speech.

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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Q: Have you heard from that guy who dropped a piano on his head? A: No one has, he dropped a piano on his head.

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How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

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How can you kill someone who looks like a squirrel? With an bomb. That would kill most people.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six hasn't been the same since he left Vietnam. Every time he closes his eyes, he's sees Charlie hiding in the darkness of the forest. Not that you could ever see those bastards, mind you. They were fast and they knew their way around the jungle. He remembers the looks on the boy's faces when they walked into that village and... oh Jesus. He shouldn't think about that now. Sometimes he still hears Tex's slow southern drawl. He remembers the smell of Brooklyn's cigarettes. He always had a pack of Luckys. But the boys are gone now... he knows that. It's--it's just that he forgets sometimes. And sometimes the way that seven looks at him... it makes him think. Sets him on edge. And he feels like he's back there... In the jungle... In the darkness. Seven has a hook for a hand as well, which is very scary.

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What did the fat man do? He fell over...

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why did my iphone screen get scratched :(? because i dropped it ):

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What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

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You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

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A man told his wife to go make him a sandwich. She said no.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops