What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

What happened to the house that was made without concrete? It fell over.

why was the guy crying at the bar his house got bombed

Does anyone know any good ways to piss off an Grammar Nazi?

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

how many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? well it depends on the size of the bathtub - and the size of the babies, for sure.

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

two muffins are in a oven the one muffin says jee its hot in here and the other muffin says wow a talking muffin

like most people my age. im 27

Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

What do you call a homeless man in Beverly Hills? Charles, Someone who unfortunately had to drop out of school at a young age to work to support his dying mother. Hence, later in life, after his mother died, lacked the education to be enrolled in college forcing him to pimp to make enough money to eat and pay for the rent in his one bedroom appartment in his hometown-Mississippi. But times were tough in Mississippi and not many people could afford a whore. This forces him to go all the way to California where he found more people there were willing to pay for a whore. Business was good and soon enough he had enough money for a decent condo. But Charles still morned the death of his mother. Eventually he couldn't take the daily pressure of being a pimp and thought of his mothers death, so he turned to heroin. Soon all his money was fueling his addiction and before he knew it he was on the street, with no one to help him and no where's to go. Every night he goes to sleep on his cardboard box with the memory of his late mother in the back of his head. Sometimes Charles wonders what he could of been if he didn't drop out of school, but he knows that what he did was the right thing.

What did one elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. Elephants don't talk.

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

why was the vampire sad? his last victim had aids.

whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

Why was the school field trip cancelled? The Holocaust.

Why did the little girl stop going to dance class? She broke both of her legs in a terrible train accident

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

a redheaded man walks into a bar. he is wanted for raping and murdering 13 children

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...