Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

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Why do so many black people like watermelon? The same reason so many white people, do. Have you had that stuff, it's really good!

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? playing spin the bottle with your mom

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http://anti-joke.com/

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What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken?

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What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What's worse that getting raped by a frog? That would never occur, as frogs do not have genitalia to commit rape.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

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Q: What do the Terms of Service say? A: I dont know, I didnt read them.

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Q.whats long, black and hard to cut through? A.a line at kfc!

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Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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