what do u get when two cars collide... a bunch of mexican

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O too.” Then he dies.

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Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

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Q:what has four legs, is green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A:a pool table

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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why was joe in hospital with facial disorder? his mum hit him with a fridge

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How did the blonde girl fall down? She didnt see where she was goin

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A man walks into a bar. He is followed by a chicken, 2 donkeys, a tiger, 7 cardinals, 3 horses, 11 chipmunks, and 2 squirrels. And they all lived happily ever after. THE END

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Two cannibals were eating a clown. Good.

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Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

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Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

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how do you wash clothes in the diswasher? you turn it on.

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A midget and a jew walk into a bar. i forget the rest of the joke but your motheris a tramp.

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Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? I cried when I cut up the onion.

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An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

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What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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What did the serial killer do when his check bounced? He promptly deposited more money into his account.

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Why wasn't my T.V. on? Because I didn't have a remote.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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