a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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Women's rights.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the cab driver say to the duck who wanted a ride in the cab? Get out of the cab.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

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what's 6 inches long and women love? my penis

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Q: what the apple say to the orange? A: nothing because there fruits and fruits cant talk

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Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

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Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

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How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

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whats worse than seeing a repeated anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

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A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

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Women can vote? WTF

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure but my guess is that there was some logical reasoning behind the action.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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