Two friends were running late for their school gathering. As they arrived the train station, one friend said 'Quick, we need to catch the train!' The other replied, 'Can't we just get in it?'

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What is funnier than onion gravy? Mushroom gravy.

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what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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What is black and blue and really is not in the mood for sex? The new girl at the women's shelter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Your dads dead. lol

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roses are read violets are blue u suck and ur gay

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Roses are black, Violets are too. I'm colourblind. Stop laughing.

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why did the chicken cross the road who's there and the man died of cancer congradulations! your preganant

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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A guy walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because he is only 19 years old.

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That's not what she said.

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Whats better than 1 dollar? 2 dollars.

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Q. Why can’t a teacher lift weights? A. Because, most teachers are women and most women do not enjoy It.

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

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What's Jewish and gay? Henry Shine

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why was the boy's face burnt? a horrible accident involving a lighter and some hairspray

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Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

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Why did the Dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Hey man have you ever seen Stevie Wonders house? ... Neither has he

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops