what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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where's waldo? in a picture book.

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Why did the little boy want to sleep with his parents in their bed on the only night in weeks they'd planned to have sex? His bedroom was on fire.

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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What did the young man's clothes smell like after a long night of partying? Laundry detergent, it was quite pleasant

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Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Hello

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Q: what's brown and rhymes with snoop? A: Dr. Dre

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

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What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

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"your momma's so fat that she died in her sleep last night," said the doctor. "There was nothing we could do."

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A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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This is an inappropriate joke and is meant to make you laugh

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What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: why the long face? he has cancer

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Once upon a time, there was a man. He was black. The end.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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