My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

Why can't Stephen Hawking go to the moon? He can, it would require a great sum of money, and extensive anti-gravity training.

An escalade with 5 black men crashes off a cliff and all of them die. this is terrible. an escalade seats 7.

Sex education in Texas.

Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

9/11, Amanda Todd, Adalia Rose, Cancer, Swag, Yolo, Disco, anything Southern, Nazi's, and Police officers walk into a bar Everyone stares because these are mildly offensive things.

children burning

Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

I heard that the Boston marathon was a BLAST!

a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

What's a fun thing to do on a plane? Make a bolt to the pilot, smash his brains in with a iron pipe and make the plane plummet a few hundred feet with a maniacal laugh until you wake up from your dream and scream at your mother to wipe you.

knock knock who's there? the chicken i just crossed the road to offer you this token of appreciation for helping me screw in a lightbulb

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

Herman Cain

Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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