Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

Knock, Knock Come in

jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

A women in the kitchen.

Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

7

knock knock who's there? Andrew Oh hey Andrew come on in!

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

4 people: A pilot, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a little kid, are all on an airplane with only 3 parachutes, when the plane's engine explodes and starts to go down. But the pilot makes an emergency landing at a nearby airport and everybody is okay.

What is brown and sticky. Hot chocolate.

How do stop a clown from laughing? Hit in the face with a hatchet.

whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

Why did the little girl drop her teddy bear? Because she was being sexually molested. Why did the little Jewish girl drop her teddy bear? Because gas came out of the shower-head.

Roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt.,

Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? I don't know, I don't have a watch anymore.

What did the children in India eat for dinner?

What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

Ding-Dong.............no knock-knocking required

A man on crutches walked across the road. Suddenly he fell and sprained his foot. He was pleased that he was carrying crutches.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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