Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

How does the cow say cash i dont know ask him he is the cow.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

Leading a hike.. Kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans him up? Bear.

Why did the kid fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? Because he had no legs. Knock, Knock Who's there? Not that kid.

Why can't black people be astronauts? Institutionalized racism.

Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

What do you get when you cross a leopard and Chuck Norris? I don't know. Probably something like a furry yellow Chuck Norris with black spots and sharp teeth.

Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

ur mum

how do you get a clown off a swing??? hit him in the back with an ax!

Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

Hellen keller

6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

Black...

What's 6 + 9? 15.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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