A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I brought a parachute as carry on luggage, I was pulled aside at security and missed my flight.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the girl say to the boy? You are a boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why would you throw a hooker in a lake? To go fishing

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a giggling penguin? Personification.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

I don't always browse the internet. But when i do i prefer Anti Joke.con

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

thumb_up thumb_down +10

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

ewrg

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

thumb_up thumb_down +7

If you dislike this you are a homosexual (watch how many dislike this)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar. The Bartender says "Why the long face?" The Bartender is then put into a lunatic asylum for hallucinating and trying to communicate with said hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Which came first? The chicken? Or the egg? Whichever one was more sexually excited i guess.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops