Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king's horses and all the king's men, went and made an omelette.

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

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I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

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How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

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There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

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gdfhtrfcgsexdfchrthgdfggfhtdtfhdtyfgfdfcghfgdyghhyrtfgrdfdffdtgdfgfghrthfg Alzheimer's.

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when do you go to heaven? Never

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What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

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What did the pedophile say to the little girl? "I have a condition and I think it would be healthy for both of us if you stayed within the supervision of your parents"

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Due to Helen Keller's disabilities she wasn't able to own an animal. If she did have a dog, it would be named spot because that was a popular pet name in that period of time.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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How are a cow and a wall the same? They both go "moo". Except for the wall.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

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In Soviet Russia, joke tells YOU! ...because that is the syntax of the language.

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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