A mermaid walks into a bar, but she has no legs, so she flops over and proceeds to drag herself into the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -34

i read the terms of service when i posted this

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I think everybody should have a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: What Did Batman Say To Robin When They Got In The Car? A: Get In The Car

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't the chicken get to the other side of the road? Because chickens are in farms

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Cut off your fingers and lose weight fast!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did Napoleon cross his legs? Because he had to go to the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +8

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Can God do anything even if it's impossible? Yes. Can God make a rock so heavy he can't lift it? Yes. Can he lift that rock? Yes. Then he just failed at making a rock so heavy he can't lift it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q:What do you call a sheep with no legs? A: A cloud.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops