What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

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Whats funny and has 2 wheels The holocaust, I lied about the wheels, and the funny

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was ferociously raped by a bear.

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there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

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A man finds an old lamp, rubs it, and releases the genie trapped inside. The genie grants him three wishes. So the man wishes for a million more wishes and uses them all wisely,

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Getting aids from that apple.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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what do a midget and a dwarf have in common? they both die by the age of 25 due to genetic failures.

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What happened the homeless guy's home? A meteor fell on it.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Your mother is so classy, when I asked her to order at a fast food drive through she decided to park the car a eat inside.

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whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

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When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

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What do you get when you cross an owl, with a bungee cord?..... My ass.

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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A rabbi and a nun walk into a bar. They grab a drink and really hit it off despite their differences. After a couple years of happy dating, the rabbi, Mark, preposes. Gloria, the nun, gladly accepts. After four months, Gloria is pregnant. She dies in childbirth. The child has many illneses and dies within a week. Mark commits suicide.

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What happens when Terran Hansen has sex with a cow? Jesse Z.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Luke Futie

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96

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Jeff" "Jeff who?" "Jeff Johnson" "From the office?" "No I work at the dehli" "The one on 6th avenue?" "No, the one on Park." "What do you want?" "Could you open the door?" "No, I don't know you" "Isn't this Mr. Walter's house?" "No, my name is Roger Stevens" "I'm sorry I must be at the wrong house" "What address are you looking for?" "15322 N Gary street" "This is 15323 N Gary" "Oh I'm sorry" "Try knocking across the street" "Thank you"

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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