When lives gives you lemons you might just be dyslexic, because life cannot actually give you lemons

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

dinosours eat beagles and then unicorns eat norwalls then th shiny squarles eat you then unvirse inploads

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Shaving your balls is just plain nuts!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

ok everybody to make this more simple we all have to line up alphabetically by height.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Water? I hardly know her.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Roses are black, Violets are black, Trees are black, WHO BURNT MY GARDEN?!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what did the frog say to the fence? chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +16

AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

There was a two car pile up at wal-mart. 50 mexicans were killed.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops