The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

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your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

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So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

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Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

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What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

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What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

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why?

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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Wanna here a funny joke Oh right. You can't hear

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Why did Bill yell? Because he stepped on a nail.

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Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face. Why was the little girl sad? Because it was her frog.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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I violate everyone that do not thumb me green, and vi0late the children, the parents, and the person of those that thumb me red... Its not about the sex, its about the domination... You might even like it...Your kids? Not so much... Well sometimes... Green thumb me, and I will... Meh, then you are awesome... friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Subscribe below, address tracker activated... LETS GO!

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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101 ways to annoy people 1.) lying about having a 101 ways to annoy people

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suicide.

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k

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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