Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

What did Batman Tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

"Why did the chicken cross the road" "why" "to get to the gay guys house" "knock-knock" "who's there?" "The chicken..."

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

i read the terms of service when i posted this

Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

what are the three types of rings? -wedding ring -engagement ring -suffering

Why did the addict choke himself with a trash bag? His family couldn't afford a funeral and it was the quickest way to disappear.

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

whats worse than fining 7 dead babies in 1 trash can? finding 1 dead baby in 7 trashcans!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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