ey can i pick your scabs plzz

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That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

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How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to give him a bad reputation, but not enough to kill him

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in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

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how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

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Ring ring yes.This is doctor steve and we got our test results and it seems that you'r son has butinites and you'r kind sytoms are nothing because he is just an ass.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am adopted And so are you

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1: What do you call your car door when it's opened slightly? 2: I don't know. What? 1: Ajar! 2: A jar? 1: No. Ajar. 2: But it's a door. 1: Just forget it.

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the chicken had enough of life and wanted to commit suicide due to recent tragic events such as his cheating wife, his druggie son, his prostitute daughter, losing his home, and getting fired

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a bus.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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Why does Beyonce sing "to the left, to the left"? Because that's where a box of everything you own is

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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Dancing Potatoe!

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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What do you call a dumb Asian? An Asian who lacks education.

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what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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