Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

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what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left... So they take the left and enjoy themselves at the place many considered the most wonderful place in the world.

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How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What's better than eating baby? Nothing.

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What battle did Napoleon die in? His last one.

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What's brown, dirty, and smells like feces? Feces

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What did the prostitute eat for lunch? Nothing because she was too busy performing oral sex for money.

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You know what's funny? Lot's of things.

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Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

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How many doctors does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. The female body inspectors? No, the female bawdy inspectors.

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what do you call a fish with no eyes fsh

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Why was Adam sad? His wife found him cheating with several women which led to a lengthy and messy divorce and him losing custody of his two children and his house.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? They can't, because feminists can never change anything!

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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There once was a mathematician, a physicist and an engineer in a room without an exit. The ceiling catches fire. They all die.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

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What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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