You know what your problem is? I'm too good looking.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a guy with no hands working in a hat store? larry

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats worst than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do cats eat for breakfast? Cat food.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the fish say? Moo

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the school teacher crying? Because after 12 minutes of watching each one of your students be crushed to death by an 18 wheeler, anyone would cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

thumb_up thumb_down -93

How do you escape from being enlisted in the army of your nation? Flee to a different country and bring along your valuables.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? The undeveloped cerebral cortex vital for comprehending irony left the chicken incapable of finding humor or possibly feeling self-disgust in the acknowledgment that it had just wandered across said road, this being a grandfathered human jest.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Old guitars sound like cat's guts

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What does Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobil? ... - Come on Robin, let's get into the Batmobil...

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why wasn't the woman in the kitchen? Because she was in the living room.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops