A man runs into a bar. He is instantly knocked out.

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How can you get a hot girl to notice you? Set her baby on fire.

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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Why couldnt i think of an anti-joke? cuz i was too high and a fly distracted me

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Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

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One time i was sitting down

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Once upon a time, a boy sat on a hedgehog. He abruptly stood up, as the spikes had caused him a certain amount of discomfort.

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A man walks into a bar and pulls out a tiny piano and a 12 inch pianist, which is really just his member with a smiley face drawn on it. Somebody calls the police muttering, "What is this world coming to?"

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Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

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What do you call it when a drunk guy puts a tree in his house and then decorates his fireplace with his socks? Christmas (I didn't come up with this)

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

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a robber walks into a bank. he steals everything and kills the guards

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What was the leg less and armless mans favorite type of music? Nubstep

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I ENJOY MASTURBATING

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what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

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what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

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Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

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What is the difference between a Mac user and a PC user? The operating system that they prefer to use.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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