What did the bird say on twitter? Tweet tweet.

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Why was six afraid of seven? 7 is greater than 6. Didn't you learn about number lines in 3rd grade?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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What time is it? 10:58

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The Chinese government. The way they treat their citizens just isn't funny.

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What did one teacher say to the other teacher? We're both under-payed.

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how do you save a black person that's drowning? you blow up their lips

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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Where do pimps go when they retire? Idaho.

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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What's worse then having your wife leaving you? Taking the kids with her.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

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Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

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Why can't helen keller skii? Because she's dead

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there was a black man his head looked like a peanut

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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Okay, so your school has a fire drill, and a ginger asks why the alarm went off. You reply, “Some new kid saw your hair and pulled the fire alarm

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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what happened to the boy that walked down the street he got hit by a falling street light

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops