What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

the holocaust

Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

What city likes baseball the most? New York

Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? answer: Where's my tractor?

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, a poor african child probably has nothing and is starving to death while you and Chuck debate on how to spend your five dollars.

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Skeletons can't move.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

What did the mentally retarded kid get in his iq test drewl

Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the mailman delivering your weekly delivery

A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat off, and the barman chuckles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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