Kids are cheering about the confetti at a birthday party, the mom says the twin towers just collapsed.

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Why did Lance Armstrong lose the race? Which race?

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What's green, yellow, and red? A traffic light

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I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

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How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

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Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

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I think poop is tasty... just kidding.

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how did the man die from falling out of the window his angry x- friend pushed him.

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who was the alien over LA? adalia rose

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KNOCK! KNOCK! Who is it? Wood pecker. Wood pecker who? KNOCK! KNOCK!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

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why did the pirate have a patch? to crack the software he had downloaded

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An Afronaut

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Q. What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? A. A bench is an inanimate object used for sitting on while a Mexican is a human being.

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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What Do You Call Black People Skydiving? A fun time.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

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what do you throw at a mexican man when he is drowning? his family.

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Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

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Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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