Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

Knock Knock, Who's There? Come in. Come in who? Your mom

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

Why couldn't the plane fly? The pilot was a muffin.

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

What's up? Well it all depends on your current position, if you are in the center of the Earth then everything would be up. In space there is no gravity so nothing is up. If you don't understand this the sky is up.

What did the litlle boy get for christmas? The toy which he could only dream about. His father got cancer.

one day i went to bed

What is the difference between a dead baby in a blender and a rock? There are many differences. One of them is the fact that I don't masturbate to a rock.

Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Because one of them looked at him funny.

What has four legs, and smells when it's wet? A wet dog.

how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Trick question they cant afford one.

I was looking out the window on a Sunday morning. The coffee was fresh, and the air was moist. I had recieved a phone call last night on the contents of a briefcase that was to be left on my front door today. The explination was vague, and I was told to enjoy my last day. Then I died.

A man walks into a bar with a sad-looking face. He orders a strong drink. The bartender asks him "What's wrong? You seem down." The man answers "Well, tough week. My wife was raped and murdered and my son was hit by a bus."

Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

Robin, get in the batmobile.

Why did the cashier let the jockey off 10 cents? because he was short 10 cents

My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

Nicole Ritchie walks into a grocery store.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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