What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

You dork, seriously, the comment where I mentioned that I am married is like 60000 comments PAGES behind. What? Now you ashamed of losing your, I mean I can say that I am your first right? That I am going to stick my MANFLESH into your CHERRY AND POP IT RIGHT? JUST TRYING TO BE SUBTLE HERE! Seriously though, Your name is really Tifa? And you look a FUCKING HELL A LOT Like Tifa From Final Fantasy... You know, except she has gigantic feet and no lips and you know...

What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

How do you have problems paying your monthly mortgage if you live in a box emmanuel

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

I'm a lion hear my threat **** you ***** and then go **** yourself. if your scared and you know it and you really want to show it crap your pants.

Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

Two black guys are seen running out of a convenient store. They've just received word that two planes crashed into the twin towers, both their sons worked maintenance on the 73rd floor.

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

If anybody wants a free RuneScape account, the username is Antbongton and the password is fluckaduck

Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

8

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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