getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

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Q: Why couldn't the skeleton go to the party A: He had a boner

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A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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Yo mama is stupid that she has an IQ below 70 and can be classified as mentally retarded.

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Waiter. there's a fly in my soup! I apologize, I'll bring you a new one immediately.

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what color is blue? green

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A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

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What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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What word starts with a P and ends with an ORN?.......Popcorn sickos!

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Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

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- Bob, what's interesting to see in NYC ? - Yes, exactly

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what do you call a mothers mothers father's brother's son's uncle's sister's brother's aunt's father's stepbrother's granddaughter's mom? I dont know... im asking you, why are you reading the answers then?

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Roses are red Bacon is also red Poems are hard Bacon

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A man walks into a bar. The bar tender asks him "why the long face?" He replies "Because I'm a horse, you jackass".

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whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

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why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

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a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? The number varies based on the amount of skill and understanding each infant has in using the paintbursh and red paint.

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45.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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