Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

It's kind of hard to die when you're in a freezer.

Often, Asians argue that they can speak properly... Like instead of L's, they use "R's." Sure... http://eng.tekkenpedia.com/wiki/Leo#Introduction

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Trick question! Feminists can't change anything.

It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

What did the cow say to the other cow? "Baaa", he had an identity crisis.

Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

Who are you texting? YOUR MOTHER.

What do you call 5 black guys at the bottom of the ocean? scuba divers

What is the most common cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

what does a granny look best in? 1950

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Robin, get in the car.

Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

getting a call from the hospital saying that your whole entire family was all killed in an explosion and they were killed from your best friend.

how many girlfriends does robert dupra have? none becomes his sister doesn't count trololololol

I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

A Chinese kid fails his math test.

Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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