Poop

Why did the girl fall off the fridge? She tripped on a rock.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

A patient walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor, Doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replies, "I have no interest in whether or not you feel like purchasing items to spruce up your home."

What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

Why was the little boy sad? Because a stranger stole his shirt.

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT Chrysanthemums are pretty but toads and people are damn to horny

What is Ciaran Wilkie Gay

What do you call someone with no legs? whatever their name is, physical appearance should have no bearing on someones title.

What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

mitt romney

What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

Yourrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr soo uglyyyyyy

pretend its saturday.... what is the square root of 9? who cares? everyone knows that you don't do math on saturday.

What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

LALALALA MUSIC MACHINE

A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

Q: How do you fit 100 mexicans in a van? A: Its theoretically impossible.

Why did the monkey fall off his tricycle? He got hit by a fridge.

What do you call a black woman getting hit in the face? Domestic Violence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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