There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose body parts were all adequate and thus could not perform any odd sexual acts upon himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a black, mexican, jewish, and white man fall off a cliff, who landed first ? all at the same time, they all died and there familys sued the clifff and commited sucicede

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the differnce between a baby and a watermelon??? One is fun to smash and one is a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down -3

i like how everyone hates a german version of an antijoke but no one has aknowleged the english one

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

your mama's so fat... that's it

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

thumb_up thumb_down -31

teacher: say ur alphabet kid: abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwuxyz kid:wheres the pee teacher:half way down my leg

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti-jokes are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I have a really funny joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are Asians so good at mathematics? Practice.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in a refrigerated freight truck en-route to its destination.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops