Hey. I have to ask you a serious question. Okay. what? You can only answer with yes or no. Okay what is it? Do your parents know your gay? .....

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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What is Arnold Schwarzenegger's favorite lollipop? Choppa Chups.

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~Chinese Anti Joke~ What is the difference between American army and Chinese army? American army teach youngsters to use their tanks. Chinese army smash youngsters with their tanks.

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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What's more fun than a negative pregnancy test? Nothing.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well, there is no way to accurately estimate this number being that 1.woodchucks in fact do not chuck wood and 2. there is no time frame given for said action to take place

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If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

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Why can't Hellen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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epic win?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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What's worse than this joke? Taking a dump on an airplane as it crashes in to the World Trade Center.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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Q. What does the pencil and the basketball have in common? A. They both are made from wood, except for the basketball.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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