Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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What has got 56 eyes, 1 leg and 3 arms ? I don't know but that's right behind you.

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How do you get an Asian man to build you a computer? Pay him a reasonable amount of money

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but Im on bath salts, and you're face looks tasty;)

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Q: why did the boy fall down when he was walking home? A: he was murdered.

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Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

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Excuse me, do you happen to have the time? No.

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Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Six and seven are numbers, and cannot feel emotions such as fear.

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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It was a warm summer day when justin beiber got hit by the bus everyone was cheering

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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