Knock Knock whose there brian Brian who oh because im chinese you assume my second name is Hu? terribly sorry theres been a misunderstanding, i was asking you surname, i should have been more specific! No it my fault, i dont know why i overreacted my second name is Hu its ok, what can i do for you? is it allright to come in for some noodles? are you paying? only a reasonable price ok then, dont see why not

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

A baby seal walks into a club.

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

If a tree falls on a woman, and there's no one around to hear it, what was a tree doing in the kitchen?

How did the boy compliment the girl? He told her she had a lot of breasts. In return, she told him he had many penises.

So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

Q: Who`s the badly treated kid at school who always faces punishment, but is inadvertently provided with recompense every single day (s)he attends class A: The poeple who fall into the category that does not encompass the people who are treated with dignity at school and never experience punishment there, but always receive some kind of reward for trying to succeed anyways.

What did the octopus say to the squid? Nothing, considering these two species can't speak.

Knock knock. Who's there. Suidi Arabia. Suida Arabia who? Huh? I was too busy loading my weaponry

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex afender

How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

Why did Hanna fall of the swing She had no arms or legs Knock knock Whose there Not Hanna Haha

A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly 10 consecutive times in the head with a knife.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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