If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Who is there? You have no Dick

thumb_up thumb_down +14

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +51

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down -13

ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

thumb_up thumb_down

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

If life throws you lemons, throw them back and ask for some water because lemonade only makes you thirstier due to the large amounts of sugar used.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Girls soccer

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the Mexican get for christmas? Nothing, he was caught sneaking over the border in November.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you say when you walk into an optical? "Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops