What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

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ahhh finally removed the splinter I've had for quite some time now. Hopefully that was the last one I'll get for a while...touch wood

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Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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Why did the asian lady buy the large shirt instead of the medium? Because the medium didn't fit

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Whats green and has wheels?? - Grass, I lied about the wheels

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Regression.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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Why did jim all I over? He dies

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? It was getting tired of the jokes

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Roses are red Violets are blue who are you kidding, violets are violet

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What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dog. Dog who? I have a dog.

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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[Insert hurtful, yet spontaneous comment here.]

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Why was the man bad at football? - he is chad henne

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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