Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

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Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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How do you get a nun pregnant? You practice unprotected sex with her.

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Whats black and hangs from the my tree? A tire swing.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's better than r a p e? Consensual sex.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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What kind of blue is not heavy? Light blue.

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Knock knock, Who's there? To get to the other side

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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What the difference between a alien and you nothing

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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I believe that as long as we do not change, as we decide to believe in ourselves and use our strength and potential, all that is left, is to see which side fate favors. Maybe we are meant to survive trough our strength and belief in ourselves and each other, or maybe we are, or will eventually end up as the last people of our kind, and fade away from life, proving that those that trust in the corrupt, where better than us. Suddenly I feel so alone.

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why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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