A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

Guess what I did to the clown I hit it with an axe

Q. What is the answer to life? A. 34

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

The Pope, Queen Elizabeth and a schoolboy are on a plane that is going to crash. It crashes and they all die instantly.

So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't go to you anyways.

Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

I got a joke. What did the Platypus say to the Policeman?" "What a ridiculous question, Platypus's can't talk.

If you're head weren't attached to your shoulders... you'd be dead.

what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

What do you call a poor man on the side of the rode asking for money? A poor man on the side of the rode asking for money.

What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

Where did the moon get its degree? Unfortunately, they haven't installed any colleges for planetary satellites yet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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