What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. A number is a mathematical object used to count and measure.It is not a living thing and therefore does not possess thoughts and feelings.

a dog ate my homework but then he returned it on the lawn

how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

j

Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

What is better than a dead baby nailed to a tree? A dead baby nailed to 10 Trees.

Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, your body rejected the transplant and you died.

what has hair? Organisms, or at least most do.

What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

why were maddie and maddy and rachel and jill all friends? we all enjoy pizza

What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

Why did the Nazi doctor drown a Jew in the lake? Because he felt like it.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

What did the kid with cancer gt for Christmas? Nothing. He didn't make it that long

Q:How can you tell an asian has just robbed your home? A: You took the necessary precautions to purchase a very high quality security system and you caught the whole thing on tape, and the man was arrested.

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...