How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black man, a Rabbi, a circus clown, a soldier and the Pope all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Where did the 5 gay guys go? One direction

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you call a green land with wheels? Grass lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the camera man say when the actor took off his pants? Why did you take off your pants?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why cant stevie wonder read? because hes black

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

People Order Our Patties

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I did your mom-A FAVOR-by making you-A SANDWICH-my favorite part was when she stripped-THE LETTUCE-then i touched her boob-OO-then we fucked

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Daniel G. Likes to perve on the boys in the locker room. Change quick guys!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops