Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

There was once a man who went to the store and walked across a bridge and bought toothpaste and yelled at a hobo and went home and took a nap and then he went back to the park where he talked to an english teacher who told him not to use run-on sentences or she would slap him with a fish.

Nobody doesn't like Sarah Lee. There are no humans, at all, anywhere in the world, who do not like Sarah Lee. None. Not even one. They do not exist in reality. Everyone likes Sarah Lee. Everyone.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion.

Ted: Joe, do you think I'm dumb? Joe: No, I think you're Ted.

Knock knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Names don't matter. Now shut up and let me in before I kill your family

What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

The cookie monster walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why do you seem so blue?" Everyone laughed. Then the cookie monster replied "my wife died."

What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

A Jewish man died in a car crash. His family mourned his death throughout the next few years.

Two muffins are in an oven. They procede to bake at 325 degrees for thirty minutes.

Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

Fat people.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

I enjoy Popcorn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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